When Floats Go Bad

During a blueflare joint session...

gobpoker111 posts the small blind of $2
gamblegambel posts the big blind of $4
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to gamblegambel [Qs Kc]
gobpoker111 raises to $12
gamblegambel raises to $42
gobpoker111 calls $30
*** FLOP *** [Qc 6d 7h]
gamblegambel bets $65
gobpoker111 calls $65
*** TURN *** [Qc 6d 7h] [Qd]
gamblegambel has 15 seconds left to act
gamblegambel checks good turn card to leave some rope and let a floater hang himself
gobpoker111 bets $125
gamblegambel raises to $262, and is all in
gobpoker111 calls $137
gamblegambel shows [Qs Kc]
gobpoker111 shows [Ah Tc]
*** RIVER *** [Qc 6d 7h Qd] [9s]
gamblegambel shows three of a kind, Queens
gobpoker111 shows a pair of Queens
gamblegambel wins the pot ($737.50) with three of a kind, Queens

Graph

WSOP Over/Unders

As inspired and continued from bad moon rising...

most cash under the castle roof at one time: 137k
# of Asians at the final table of the main event: 2.5
latest time of the day someone will wake up from a full night of rest: 6:49 PM
# of sake-bombs consumed by the crew: 120
biggest acey-deucey pot: $2600
# of people staying at the castle at peak occupancy: 21.5
field goal % of pimaster's patented jump shot: 62
pounds of meat to be barbecued in the back yard: 39.3
# of empty applesauce containers left around the castle at one time: 14
longest moon/pimaster continuous discussion/argument about one topic: 47 min.
largest credit card roulette: $1241

Two Lists

Ten Things About WSOP I Am Looking Forward to:

1. Massive amounts of various gambling
2. NBA Slam (NBA Jam drinking game)
   
3. The dream of winning a bracelet
4. Sake bombs at the Orleans
5. The castle
6. The sunsets
7. Credit card roulette (would like to challenge someone to break my record of $1400)
8. Blokus
9. Drunken 1/2nl with the crew
10. The stories

Ten Things About WSOP I Am Not Looking Forward to:

1. Being away from my family
   
2. Being away from my gf
   
3. Being away from my friends
   
4. Being away from my dog
5. Being away from my condo
6. Being away from my DVR
7. Being away from my car
8. Being away from my local watering hole
   
9. Being away from my sense of normality
   
10. The weather

I fly out June 4th

Creative Short

Alex had forearms like a professional bowler, but his superior antebrazos were unable to displace his chronic depression. He managed to compensate for the lack of sunlight in his basement apartment with KC and the Sunshine posters and magazine ads for Sunny-D. "Borrowed" wireless Internet from a neighboring unit provided hours of late night gaming and endless redeveloping of his My Space page for his remaining twenty eight online friends. His facial hair teetered between bushy and Brillo pad depending on whether or not the bathroom light bulb had been replaced; for an electrical short kept him a regular in the CVS household aisle. A corner closet contained hordes of garments obtained from countless high school thrifting trips and hand-me-downs from two older brothers with poor taste and a step sister with a fondness for red Chucks.

Alex never had much trouble getting out of bed in the morning for his computer was set to play random tracks off of the Blue album every day at 7:41 a.m. Weezer at dawn always seemed to cheer him up. He spent five days a week grinding it out at the local doormat manufacturer under the supervision of his uncle charlie for whom he wasn't very fond. A childhood of opulent expectations for an unlikely future had left an indestructible tumor of dismay aboard his cerebral path. It was no wonder his drink of choice was whiskey. He hated Tuesdays the most.

After watching the halfway season finale for the ABC television series Lost [which he had recorded on his laptop] Alex got to thinking... what the hell am I doing, seriously . Such minimal questioning resulted in a late night stroll. Once familiar places seemed to be growing increasingly distant. Alex's rhythmically brisk pace conveniently complemented the brisk atmosphere. His toes accepted the cold crisp air with each encouraging step. Unknown faces gleamed with familiarity. It began to drizzle. His once seemingly unfathered route found him afoot the home front of his now long lost love. He looked up, smirked, and proceeded back on his way. He forgot about it all for a moment. He forgot about he lousy job - his dilapidated shoes - his cheating ex girlfriend - his disheveled apartment. The weight of having let himself down for so many years eased ever so gently. Alex gazed over his shoulder into the window of a now closed storefront and caught a glimpse of himself through the half reflective glass that separated his tattered soul from a collection of some new fourth generation digital cameras, which were now 15% off. And as he stood there in an increasingly meditative gaze he saw past the shabby merchandise, beyond his older brothers Judas Priest shirt, and for the first time in as long as he could remember he saw a person worth being.

HH's

I thought I had a good mark this evening and played some deep stacked 10-20. After battling for an hour or so I left after down around 500 I think. I might have underestimated him at first and decided to abandon ship after some lost momentum. Here are two of the more interesting hands...

gamblegambel posts the small blind of $10
Bustable posts the big blind of $20
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to gamblegambel [Jh Td]
gamblegambel raises to $60
Bustable raises to $180
gamblegambel calls $120
*** FLOP *** [8s 4s 7c]
Bustable checks
gamblegambel bets $205 thought he might be on a give up on that board with AQ AK KQ etc
Bustable calls $205
*** TURN *** [8s 4s 7c] [9c]
Bustable checks
gamblegambel bets $500 bingo turn, tried to make a weak looking bet here
Bustable raises to $1,693.50, and is all in
gamblegambel calls $1,193.50
Bustable shows [As Ad] cooler I guess
gamblegambel shows [Jh Td]
*** RIVER *** [8s 4s 7c 9c] [7d]
Bustable shows two pair, Aces and Sevens
gamblegambel shows a straight, Jack high
gamblegambel wins the pot ($4,156.50) with a straight, Jack high

Seat 1: Bustable ($3,395)
Seat 2: gamblegambel ($3,469)
Bustable posts the small blind of $10
gamblegambel posts the big blind of $20
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to gamblegambel [Kd Ks]
Bustable calls $10
gamblegambel raises to $60
Bustable calls $40
*** FLOP *** [2s 4h Tc]
gamblegambel bets $111
Bustable has 15 seconds left to act
Bustable raises to $280 unless he has 22/44/24 I have nothing to worry about here
gamblegambel calls $169 I think a reraise in this spot is just missing out on value
*** TURN *** [2s 4h Tc] [5s]
gamblegambel bets $465 trying to rep a 66 77 QT here hoping he will attack this weakness
Bustable has 15 seconds left to act
Bustable calls $465
*** RIVER *** [2s 4h Tc 5s] [5c]
gamblegambel has 15 seconds left to act
gamblegambel bets $1,000 this might have been a valueless bet, but I think I get paid here by a strangely played 9To etc
Bustable calls $1,000
*** SHOW DOWN ***
gamblegambel shows [Kd Ks] two pair, Kings and Fives
Bustable shows [6c 3c] a straight, Six high didn't see that coming... I left after this hand
Bustable wins the pot ($3,609.50) with a straight, Six high

Broken Man

There are few things more satisfying than stacking a guy for 500 big blinds with two pots within 3 minutes in a split pot game with a low out...

2:57:51 ET - 2008/05/16
Seat 1: YelowSub86 ($505.70)
Seat 2: gamblegambel ($440.90)
YelowSub86 posts the small blind of $0.50
gamblegambel posts the big blind of $1
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to gamblegambel [Ad 4s Ks Kd]
YelowSub86 raises to $3
gamblegambel has 15 seconds left to act
gamblegambel raises to $9
YelowSub86 calls $6
*** FLOP *** [9s 8s 7s]
gamblegambel bets $18
YelowSub86 has 15 seconds left to act
YelowSub86 calls $18
*** TURN *** [9s 8s 7s] [5c]
gamblegambel bets $54
YelowSub86 calls $54
*** RIVER *** [9s 8s 7s 5c] [9h]
gamblegambel bets $162
YelowSub86 calls $162
*** SHOW DOWN ***
gamblegambel shows [Ad 4s Ks Kd] a flush, King high, for high and 8,7,5,4,A, for low
YelowSub86 mucks
gamblegambel wins the high pot ($242.75) with a flush, King high
gamblegambel wins the low pot ($242.75) with 8,7,5,4,A
*** SUMMARY ***
Total pot $486 | Rake $0.50
Board: [9s 8s 7s 5c 9h]
YelowSub86 (small blind) mucked [Jc 7d 3d 6c]

3:00:21 ET - 2008/05/16
Seat 1: YelowSub86 ($238.40)
Seat 2: gamblegambel ($706.90)
gamblegambel posts the small blind of $0.50
YelowSub86 posts the big blind of $1
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to gamblegambel [9s Ad 4d Qc]
gamblegambel raises to $3
YelowSub86 calls $2
*** FLOP *** [Js 6d 2d]
YelowSub86 checks
gamblegambel bets $6
YelowSub86 calls $6
*** TURN *** [Js 6d 2d] [5h]
YelowSub86 checks
gamblegambel bets $18
YelowSub86 calls $18
*** RIVER *** [Js 6d 2d 5h] [9d]
YelowSub86 bets $54
gamblegambel has 15 seconds left to act
gamblegambel has requested TIME
gamblegambel raises to $216
YelowSub86 has 15 seconds left to act
YelowSub86 has requested TIME
YelowSub86 calls $157.40, and is all in
*** SHOW DOWN ***
gamblegambel shows [9s Ad 4d Qc] a flush, Ace high, for high and 6,5,4,2,A, for low
YelowSub86 is sitting out
YelowSub86 mucks
gamblegambel wins the high pot ($238.15) with a flush, Ace high
gamblegambel wins the low pot ($238.15) with 6,5,4,2,A
*** SUMMARY ***
Total pot $476.80 | Rake $0.50
Board: [Js 6d 2d 5h 9d]
Seat 1: YelowSub86 (big blind) mucked [9h 8s 7d Jh]

Update

My laptop screen looks like this:
My gf is out of town for the weekend
I am very very very bored

HH+Chat

KKBigDawwg69: posts small blind $25
SobraoBoY: posts big blind $50
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to KKBigDawwg69 [3c Kc]
poopers: folds
Semifaded: folds
samh133: folds
BETlehem333: folds
Kelisitaan: folds
KKBigDawwg69: raises $100 to $150
SobraoBoY: raises $400 to $550
KKBigDawwg69: raises $850 to $1400 and is all-in gamblegambel
SobraoBoY: calls $850
*** FLOP *** [6d Ah Jd]
*** TURN *** [6d Ah Jd] [2h]
*** RIVER *** [6d Ah Jd 2h] [9s]
*** SHOW DOWN ***
KKBigDawwg69: shows [3c Kc] (high card Ace)
SobraoBoY: mucks hand
KKBigDawwg69 collected $2797 from pot
KKBigDawwg69: felt it
SobraoBoY: u are idot
SobraoBoY: k3
SobraoBoY: jjajaja
SobraoBoY: wait...
SobraoBoY: mucked [8s 4s]

I Hate My Job #42

An Exercise in How Not to Convince People to Play You Heads Up on the Short Stack

TANOyTERRIER: 800minimum
gamblegambel: i would if i could
TANOyTERRIER: are you going to be a dbag
and just stay here?
gamblegambel: are you gonna be a dbag and
not play?
TANOyTERRIER: yeah, im a dbag bc i dont
wanna play a short stacked hit and runner
TANOyTERRIER: and THERE ARE
UNLIMITED TABLES
gamblegambel: how many you want to play
me at once on?
TANOyTERRIER: depends how much u buy
in for
gamblegambel: 401
TANOyTERRIER: 0
gamblegambel: 402
gamblegambel: 799?
TANOyTERRIER: 1
gamblegambel: 400

x_volta: buy in full
gamblegambel: i only can do 400 right now
x_volta: ok well play someone else then
gamblegambel: but im already here
x_volta: look this isnt a debate i dont feel like
playing a shortstack
gamblegambel: why not?
x_volta: because
gamblegambel: scared?
x_volta: terrified

gamblegambel: play?
gamblegambel: come on bro
BodaciousBro: more $ brah
gamblegambel: k
*adds 1 dollar*
gamblegambel: play?
BodaciousBro: 399 more
gamblegambel: thats too much yo
gamblegambel: just sit in
gamblegambel: and the cards will deal
gamblegambel: and we gamble

Kaintd77: i will report you if this continues
Kaintd77: i have made it clear i wont play you
gamblegambel: report me?
Kaintd77: sitting with me is now table blocking
Kaintd77: email Madison at FTP support if u
want further info
gamblegambel: tables are made to play cards
not block
Kaintd77: if i dont want to play u, u cant follow
me around
Kaintd77: why bother
Kaintd77: i dont want to take the time or
enegery to report, just leave me laone
Kaintd77: it senseless to keep sitting with
someone that wont play u
gamblegambel: but i like you
gamblegambel: we can work well together
Kaintd77: leave me alone pls
gamblegambel: that's it, im reporting you
Kaintd77: for choosing not to play you
Kaintd77: ok, u've gone too far, this chat will
be included, u are table blocking and i will not
stand for it
Kaintd77: i have told you 20x i wont play you
gamblegambel: its called table wasted
Kaintd77: and u sit and block over and over
and now u threaten me?
Kaintd77: there are infiniite tables idiot
gamblegambel: FTP doesnt take kindly to
wasted tables
Kaintd77: yes they do, pls contact Madison at
FTP for further details of your vilations, good
day

TheRatholer: play?
fefifofum: buyin more and sure
TheRatholer: play?
fefifofum: plz leave
fefifofum: or deposit 800
TheRatholer: i dont have 800 more
fefifofum: 400 more
TheRatholer: or i would
TheRatholer: just play
TheRatholer: if i double up
TheRatholer: i have 400 more
fefifofum: please leave then
TheRatholer: if not
TheRatholer: you ahve my money
TheRatholer: go all in blind?
fefifofum: i dont like gambling
fefifofum: so no
TheRatholer: i can out play you for the 400 than
fefifofum: why r u still arguing?
fefifofum: just leave plz
TheRatholer: you leave
TheRatholer: this is my table
TheRatholer: i am the one looking to gamble
TheRatholer: go cry somewhere else

gamblegambel: oy
scallon123: no ty
gamblegambel: why not?
scallon123: if you add more Ill play
gamblegambel: oh wow, i didnt even see i
was short

What Breaking Even for One Hundred Forty five Thousand Hands Looks Like...

Wise Words from WPT on Short Stacking

The Idiot's Guide to Short Stacking for Dummies

Lately I've had several people ask me for pointers and tips on short stacking for beginners; so I will take the luxury of killing multiple birds with one virtual blog post stone:

1. Fragile egos need not apply - You will get made fun of in the chat and by many of your online poker peers. No one loves a short stacker. I would recommend turning off the chat unless you can stomach a seemingly endless onslaught of "your mother" jokes.
2. It's a roller coaster - The variance is like no other game. Nearly all the profits come from all in pots, so if your hands don't hold you better ready yourself for free fall.
   
3. Love to be hated - When you were a young child at play time did you grab for the He-Man or the Skeletor? If you answered Skeletor short stacking might be for you; prepare to play the villain.
4. More equals better - Short stacking is a thoughtless form of poker. If you can handle playing 79 tables at once - do it.
5. Give up quickly - As Coach McGuirk once said, "Anything too hard in life is not worth doing. Remember that. Like snowboarding, or martial arts. Pottery, or math. The point is, if you're not immediately good at something, why do it?"

A Few More Sketches