Saturday, October 13, 2007

The Plagues of Degeneracy

Turning our water into blood red gambling goodness. (from Poker Water's website) "Epimedium is a tonic that strengthens the nerves." Someone forgot to tell Wikipedia about this remarkable characteristic [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Epimedium]. If you need a drink to build up the nerve to gamble, you're probably better off sticking to Halo 3.


An epidemic of head lice. Late hours, poor hygiene, Holiday Inn Express comforters. As a gambler it is in your best interest to check that hotbed regularly before you fall victim to these parasites (notice the nits in the picture - pun... shippppppp)


Untimely storms of fiery hail. Does your internet seem to always go out at the worst possibly time? Only plausible reasoning - Moses is pissed your gambling away your life.


A swarm of locusts will descend upon those with wicked souls. Yankees reaching for that OFF! in a vain attempt to undue divine intervention, a bit of a fly problem at the EPT Baden final table. Those of hardened hearts will soon regret their decisions.


The final plague is a bit of a misstep by god. Since most gamblers have minimal social skills, obscure life styles, and scarce interaction with ladies there are hardly any first born males to kill off.
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